I have an odd obsession with due dates.
Most people dread them- I know. It makes sense. A due date is foreboding. Threatening, even. To some it is an ever creeping, ever deepening, ever growing force that can take over and possess a person, I get it.
But to me- a due date is freedom.
When I wake up on a due date, as a natural-born and unashamed procrastinator all I can think of is, "WOW. This is the LAST time I will EVER have to think of this in my ENTIRE life. crazy awesome."
Granted, I should add a dose of concern to my celebratory stress-release. Maybe just an ounce of the teeth-grinding, down to the wire, sweatin it out sort of stuff? Just a touch of the gut-wrenching, nail-biting obligatory "ughhh" that comes with a due date....but no. not my style. why ruin a good thing?
And on THAT note- my Civ pro paper was due tonight :) I am DUN.

And you know, as a tangent of/disclaimer to that thought...
It's not that I'm lazy.
I'm not.
Or at least I don't think I am...
It's getting harder and harder to find a balance. I used to think I had a really healthy sort of apathy toward my school work. Then i realized a) there is no such thing as healthy apathy and b) there are far fewer apathetic people in law school then there are in undergrad.

This leads me to another revelation:
Living relatively is not an option. You can get lost in this endless sea of, "Well, i'm not as bad as him, but I'm definitely better off than her..."
This isn't a competition.
I'm here for the ride.
I need to learn discipline but not obsession.
I know my identity.
I know that I am "a stranger with a stranger's indifference"
I know my my value is in Christ.

Yesterday I was reminded by an "old friend" what I live by:

Your money, your singleness, marriage, talent, and time,

they were loaned to you to show the world that Christ is Divine

that's why it's Christ in my rhymes

That's why it's Christ all the time

my whole world is built around him He's the life in my lines.

Thanks Lecrae. Thanks for reminding me of how Christ changed my life, heart, plans, priorites. How He made broken things in my life whole. Joyless things in my life full. Thanks.

---

And here's to a wonderful night a with a new bf :)

*insert pic of jess and I having a lovely glass of wine and a sleepover that I am too impatient to wait to load. maybe later :)*

What is it that makes me think updating my blog isn't important?

Don't I KNOW that I and the entire functioning universe will collapse and simultaneously self-destruct if I fail to post?

I mean, pshh, seriously. How selfish can I be?

Sorry for the delay, ladies and gentlemen.

Well... ladies.

~

Today is the 8th. Our final legal reasoning research and writing papers are due the 18th. That, as Jean Dailey, writing specialist extraordinaire, informed us today is less than a week and half away, woohoo.

In those few precious precious days, I have to:

-write, correct, edit, revise, RErevise, analyze, punctuate, cite, grammar check, spell check, format check, read, REread, rip up, redo, and eventually submit the paper that will eventually prove to be the end of me.

-spend 5 hours in torts because Cady is dictator

-study for/take a contracts midterm

-read a semesters worth of Civil procedure material

-take an optional civ pro midterm and an UNoptional civ pro unit quiz

-write my dreaded assigned torts brief

-keep up with the general, ever-piling up work load of day-to-day law school

-pray that my new debit card comes in the mail

-find my old debit card that I presumed lost and curse it for not being found a day sooner

-go home and eat some of momma's fine home cookin :)

-pay the municipal court $20 for a parking ticket I've had since March

-call Beth. If you're reading this- I really do love you, despite my crappy friend routine.

-Load Citrix onto my computer so I can pretend that I'm going to have enough time to work this semester in addition to the rest of my craziness.

and still...

there is a glimmer of hope.

a light at the end of the tunnel.

Because when it's ALLLLLL done, so am I :)

I can breathe look back in satisfaction at the things I have accomplished and remember that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phil. 4:13

I love those moments.

~

I got to Skype with Kait tonight! Kaitlin, for anyone who doesn't know, is my best friend. She was my roommate for 2 years in college, and after graduation, she decided to move to Maracaibo, Venezuela with Campus Crusade for Christ to take the Gospel to students there who don't know about Jesus.

I'm so proud of her and I love her with all of my heart.

I miss her like crazy.

I like it better when she's only one room a way :(

Here's a snapshot I took of her while we were skyping tonight!

Notice the spaghetti strap tank top....Maracaibo knows no winter!

Soooooo jealous!

Thanks for reading bloggers :)